On Cats:

Wikipedia starts off their article on cats as follows, "The cat (felis catus), also known as the domestic cat or house cat to distinguish it from other felines and felids, is a small domesticated carnivorous mammal that is valued by humans for its companionship and its ability to hunt vermin and household pests." Let's break this quote down real quick. First half of quote: accurate. Its common knowledge that cats are also known as a house cat to distinguish it from other felines, and yes it is domesticated. Second half of quote: absolute horse shit.

Does this cat look like its useful for hunting vermin? Didn't think so.

As for the companionship part... I am yet to meet a cat that doesn't act like it is the spawn of Satan. They act more like they want to kill you than your companion. Take, for example, their habit of pawing your face while you sleep. For one it is as annoying as hell and doesn't let you get a good night's sleep. More importantly though, even though it may not be very good at smothering, it doesn't stop the cat from trying.

There are those protestors out there that argue, "But Magnus cats are useful! They are good hunters! They bring dead birds and mice all the time to the house as presents. And how can you not say they aren't good companions!? They love being your pet and being with you."

These people need to be slapped awake. Leave your door open for your precious house cat and see how long it takes for it to get out. Think it's coming back? Think again. That thing is long gone and you are all the better for it. And as for the mice and birds it brings you? Its not a present, its a fucking sign.

Just saying, it's possible.

- Magnus, t.C.